It’s no shock that the portrayal of women in magazines makes women feel like dirt. But did you know images of hot chicks make men feel worse, too? Everyone knows that the way women are portrayed in our culture – sexy, skinny, tall – makes the average woman feel a bit like the gum I had to peel off my shoe this morning. When we look at magazine ads or watch TV shows, we women feel inadequate – and it’s no wonder, when the average woman model weighs up to 25% less than the typical woman and maintains a weight at about 15 to 20% below what is considered healthy for her age and height. But the 40,000 or so ads the average American is exposed to a year aren’t just affecting the girls. A new study coming out of the University of Missouri found that men react negatively to unrealistic ads, too. What’s interesting is it wasn’t images of hot men that got the guys feeling self conscious – it was images of hot women.
The research began by trying to see if men were as negatively affected by men’s magazines as women are by Cosmo and the like. Men that were given men’s magazines like Maxim had lower self image, which got the researchers to question exactly what about the magazines cause the drop in self esteem. So they showed men just the pictures of objectified women, men, and the articles and again checked their esteem levels. They found that, surprisingly, it wasn’t the images of idealized men that made the guys feel inadequate – it was the women. Even more surprising was that the male fashion group reported the least amount of body self-consciousness among the three groups – the guys couldn’t care less what the other men looked like.
If you’ve ever been in high school, it’s obvious why seeing a hot woman would make a less than ideal looking guy feel bad. I mean, what guy hasn’t choked when trying to talk to the head cheerleader? Attractive women are intimidating, and the mere sight of one is enough to cause any average joe to give themselves a quick once-over.
The theory is that a beautiful women makes a man self conscious because the he’s reminded that he’s not in her league – that is, they take one look at a hot girl and quickly realize there’s no way they’re good-looking enough to bang her. Since women have the larger investment in offspring, they tend to be considered the ‘picky’ ones, evolutionarily speaking. The men and their billions of sperm have to compete with other guys to convince a girl that they’ve got the genes to be worth it.
To test this theory, the researchers performed one more experiment. They broke the men into two groups – one received magazine layouts of sexually idealized females and the other received the same layouts with average-looking ‘boyfriends’ added to the photos, with captions about how the female models are attracted to the average-looking men. The men who looked at just the model were more self-conscious, presumably because when the other men saw the bombshells liked ‘normal guys,’ they no longer felt she was out of reach.
Personally, I’d like to see if images of hot men have the same effect on women. Despite the evolutionary argument, I think that women would have the same reaction to male models as men do to female ones. After all, you don’t hear a girl say “oh crap! I gotta go fix my hair!” when this guy walks in the room:
I want you. I need you. Oh baby – oh baby. Read more of my stuff over at Observations of a Nerd
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Why shouldn’t a beautiful woman expect someone as special as herself? Essentially you are saying that beautiful women should have to settle for less because they are beautiful.
It is very easy to blame others (i.e. beautiful people) for your own poor self esteem. “you are beautiful and I am not… therefore it is your fault that I am depressed”. More time should be spent teaching women to love what is special about them because it is not all about looks.
I consider myself a beautiful woman but I do not for an instant delude myself into thinking that my boyfriend is with me simply because I am beautiful. Actually I would have to say he loves me despite my looks. Many men are actually interested in personality and a brain and the same goes for women.
I wish I could be tall, leggy, with at least size C boobs and a tan for a day- knowing I could turn heads of all various ages of men would feel pretty good.
Not to brag but that’s me here and like the last “hot girl” here said, while it could be fun it really can not be that great too. I guess its something you can’t turn on or off. Men can be pigs and women have their own insecurites to make you feel alienated. You walk down the street and feel like a piece of meat. People look at you and like the girl before me said ‘you develop complexes’, you’re like are they looking because I have something in my teeth but no wait I didn’t smile, so according to past comments its because they find me attractive. So much to the point that my own effing male doctor had me sitting in front of him unclothed. They see me but not my inside sensitivity. So excuse us men: for being too picky or women: for being too bitchy because sometimes that’s the only way to protect ourselves inside and out. Beautiful, average, or ugly we all have feelings don’t we.
Go Girl. All this is so true!
I know its hard to accept, but it’s human nature to look at other asthetically pleasing humans. I check out hot women all the time myself (I am a heterosexual woman) and what is going through my mind is “Wow, she’s nearly perfect… what genetics” and if a straight guy ogles her, he’s probably thinking, “Wow, she is so smokin hot, I wonder if she’d have sex with me?” – both of these observations are based on looks ONLY, and exist within a vacuum where reality, responsibilities, and current relationships hold no influence… it’s like a theory: ‘would she sleep with me if both of us were single.’
But men are not two dimensional… their attraction to women is just as complex as our attraction to men. What gets him going isn’t just a tight ass or perfect proportions, it might be the cute way you laugh, the way you smell in the morning, the way you kiss, the cute way your butt shimmies when you walk, or a hundred other things that have to come together to really turn his crank. You have them, she doesn’t.
Most women have a “dream guy” – he has a look and a set of behaviors that she would LOVE to meet, but as we get older we realize that’s just fantasy. He probably picks at his toes before bed and eats too many onions to REALLY be our dream guy. Plus, his laugh is annoying and he’s far too obsessed with his hair. You get the picture.
So, in a nutshell, don’t worry about the theorizing… just concentrate on reality. :)
That;s wonderfull…are u is a smart woman!
I would like to now! HEHE!
Only And to the girls….quit being so transparent in your malice towards those women you perceive to be better than you. Guess what? I am better than you. Not because I can have any man I want based on my looks…
Congratulations!
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Some good looking women also have BRAINS. You may not believe it, but it’s true. Some beautiful girls don’t let man-sluts “bang” them.
No matter how many stupid advice pages that you waste your money on, the beautiful smart girl ALWAYS gets to choose. You are just making advice guys rich, because you desperately want to believe.
Listen up, AVERAGE GUYS – you can never, ever, say that you can get ANY girl. It’s completely NOT TRUE. I select the guy that I want, and so do about 20 hot girls that I know. They are dating or married to men right now…. and if you approach them in public, you are NOT GOING TO GET THEM NO MATTER WHAT.
GET realistic. Assess yourself realistically. Look for someone in your league, or go home. Some of us hot girls would like to enjoy our lives with you average boys and your pathetic attempts to force yourself on people that aren’t interested. We are not pieces of meat for you to bang. We are people with brains and hearts and our OWN CHOICES.
I disagree with your comments. You said ” the reason why the good looking guy gets the good looking girl, is because his self esteem has been boosted his entire life.” Such an over statement, not every good looking guy has some huge boosted self-esteem. Most of the time they are complete assholes, that are too focused on themselves, where you have a caring, very confident average guy that has learned to appreciate him for him. The bases of any persons confidence and personality is based on their up bringin, not by how good looking they are. Remember this, people that are shallow are like puddles you skip around them. Have fun in your endeavors!!
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I think some of these comments are being made by women who either aren’t sexy or dont think that they are.
I’m a damn sexy woman. And I go for guys that would consider me “out of their league”. I’ve had guys get so completely terrified of me they cut the relationship off because they think they have to live up to some impossible standard not to lose me to another guy.
To the guys, you are only inadequate if you think you are. Otherwise if a sexy girl is into you, she’s into you. Most of us date on personality, not on looks. And there’s no defining leagues. And no I’m not shallow. I want a real relationship with a real man. The label of “average” is just about perspective. No one is average once you get to know them. But some men are cowards. They think in terms of “leagues” and always place themselves on the bottom rung. This is what sets them up for failure with ANY chick. Not just the hot ones.
And to the girls….quit being so transparent in your malice towards those women you perceive to be better than you. Guess what? I am better than you. Not because I can have any man I want based on my looks. But because I dont put myself in a league of any kind but my own. And thats the league of a confident, intelligent woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to go out and get it instead of sit around whining over how I’m not good enough and it’s all men’s fault, magazines fault, society’s fault. It’s your own damn fault.
Sex sells, especially when you’re buying sex.
Number one learn to use spell check and correct your grammar and second most guys are so brainwashed by the crap they’re being fed through the media that many of them don’t know a real woman when they see one. The fact that many “sexy” women tend to be full of themselves and are the same stupid bitches that make fun of average women telling them how they can’t get a man when it’s pretty ironic to see a lot of ‘sexy’ girls and women who are more single than a dollar bill. These so called sexy women are usually ones guys don’t stay with very long once the vanity wears off.
Whether they are “hot” or not, some are charismatic enough to hang with the ones who are. not all hot people are that shallow.
“Hot girl” here, and it’s not that great. Most of the attention you get from men is negative (they treat you like an object), and many women assume you’re a bitch and resist your overtures of friendship. You get totally invested in your looks and develop complexes that, according to older hot women I know, don’t go away. Because men tend to treat hot women like Chanel handbags, after 10 years of dating I’ve only met 1 man who was interested in and finally loves me for my character (plus he’s hot; I’m marrying him!!)
Slap that man of yours next time his eyes stray — you sound awesome and he’s lucky to have you!
In the long run, I would much rather have an average looking girl. I’ve never met a nice girl who was extremely hot. I find myself more attracted to average women than hot ones simply because I don’t think they would turn me down. It’s not that they are desperate, it’s that they’re not bitches. Yes, most hot girls are bitches, and every hot girl I’ve ever met was. So, average, and even unattractive women, keep it up cause I love yah, you’re doin the whole guy race a favor by being real and honest to society.
I completely disagree. Women are crazy. They do not realize what drives them. Any guy can get any girl. The reason why the good looking guy gets the good looking girl is because his self esteem has been boosted his entire life. He hasn’t had to worry about rejection. For the rest of us, all this means is that we have to retrain the way we think–make ourselves into more confident beings. Women do not care about how you look–not in the long run anyways. They care soo much about your personality. If you go up to a hot girl with “I wanna bang you” written all over your face, get in line. So does every other guy. You have to make her feel different. Do something unpredictable because if every guy wants to bang her, she gets to choose, not you. If you can break her concentration for lack of a better word, you increase your odds of getting what you want.
He shouldn’t be upset. He should just appreciate, then move on to someone like him.
The average guy IS NOT going to get a beautiful woman. There’s only so many beautiful women, there isn’t enough for every average guy to have one.
AND, why should he deserve something more than average? How is that fair?
Why should the beautiful woman deserve something as special as herself?
Average guys, get over yourself and date an average woman. There is enough women to go around if you are realistic.
If you are waiting for Barbie, you are going to be very alone, or will need to spend a lot of your hard-earned cash to buy Barbie!
Yeah, I`m an average chick, yep I am attainable. Yet I`m not the hot one guys trip over on the street or loose their tongue with. I wish I was that girl for just one day. I wonder how it feels to be that hot. I got the tall, dark and handsome guy who loves me heaps, yet I worry about losing him to someone he can`t help keeping his eyes off. Its hard being around him when he is oggling really hot chicks, I think maybe he deserves to be with them, not me, cause I am more plain. I`m ok never been short of a man. I`m short, white skin, average, not overweight and 40 with one child- and yeah a 30 yr old is looking hotter now. I wish I could be tall, leggy, with at least size C boobs and a tan for a day- knowing I could turn heads of all various ages of men would feel pretty good. How many men dream of having an average girl over a hot one? I would liken myself closer to Bridget Jones without makeup on a normal day. I think the fact I am not dumb and can hold a conversation gets me over the line. Its stressful being average, especially now surrounded by hot mamas who look like they have never given birth while my hips popped out from a size 8-10, and now a 12. I bust my butt at the gym and look after myself to maintain myself and my relationship..
So I came to the site to look at different poses… What I got was a lot of ideas about what people think of the content. So my opinion, not that any one asked is this. Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder! I have taken pics of the ” hot ” and the ” average ” The difference is who you think is hot and average. Most women are gorgeous, they just don’t think so because they have had some guy or girl tell them that they are worthless and ugly! Reality Any one can be amazing, and no it doesn’t take drugs diet or surgery. It takes self awareness confidence. Are the leggy models fun to look at? Yes, and so is a bright pink V W bus… The point Im trying to make is that any one can be and should be beautiful! And if we all start to treat people that way and teach our children to be confident that they are then we will see the change that we all so desperately need.
pure enchantment photography
Sex sells, especially when you’re selling sex.
take a beta-blocker.